Letter to Aubrey on her Fourth Birthday

Sweet Aubrey,

Today you turn four. FOUR! You're no longer a baby or even a toddler. You are really and truly a little girl, and what a sweet, beautiful little girl you've become. Daddy and I were talking just last night about what a joy you've been lately. Of course, I love you every second of every day, but lately, I've just been enjoying you so much. You have gone from being somewhat strong-willed and stubborn to an extremely sweet-natured, responsible little girl. You do still have a stubborn streak (I think most of us probably do), but I feel like you've really started to mellow out lately. You are incredibly nurturing. You are so sweet with Jude and Alaina. When Jude is upset about something, you often try to make him feel better. You are just precious with Alaina. I'm not exaggerating when I say that you have been nothing but sweet to her since the day she was born. You told me the other day that you just "love babies." I've always loved babies, too, sweet girl, so that made me smile :) You're a very responsible child too. You help me out so much by watching Jude when I'm feeding Alaina, and even though you're still little yourself, I really do rely on you a lot.

When you were younger, I never would have considered you a shy child, but you have gotten to be a little more reserved lately. I think you're just losing your "baby personality" and your "big girl personality" is starting to develop. At home, you're chatty and funny and you talk all the time. You're a tad bit bossy with your brother too ;) When you are around a lot of people, you tend to be more quiet, and you really don't enjoy being the center of attention. We had a pinata at your birthday party, and all of your friends hit it, but you wouldn't. Daddy and I asked you why you didn't want to hit it, and you said you were "too nervous." That's pretty typical of you at this stage. I'm curious to see if that sticks, or if it's just a phase. If you decide that you're not a "performer" and you would rather watch than be in the thick of things, that's perfectly fine :)

You absolutely love to color and draw. I think you could sit and color for hours. When we were doing our Morning Meetings over the summer, your favorite part was the tracing. You also have recently developed a love for music. As soon as we get in the car, you ask us to turn up the "singing." You recognize a lot of the musical instruments: "That boy is playing the guitar." or "That sounds like a piano." It's neat to see what you're good at and what you enjoy. Right now it seems like you might be a little bit artistic.

 Just this week, we had a major milestone. You started school! Thankfully, you only go two days a week. Any more than that, and Mommy would be really sad! You're going to a special school where you get to learn fun stuff like ballet, tap, kindermusik, and Spanish. The other stuff, you'll be learning at home with Mommy :) So far, you've been twice and really seem to enjoy it. Hearing you talk about how much fun you're having makes it easier for me to send you away for two days. You have been at home with me full-time for four years, and I'm so so thankful for that time we had. I will never get those baby and toddler days back, and I'm so happy that I didn't miss any of them. Looking back, I can say that it was absolutely worth all of the hard days to have you with me all the time. I wouldn't trade those memories for anything. I'm so thankful that we still get to spend so much time together, and I can't wait to make many more happy memories with you, my sweet girl .

You have really shown that you have a tender heart lately. When you do something you know you weren't supposed to, a lot of times you come and apologize for it without me even telling you to. You like to talk about God and you bring Him into our everyday conversations often. Today, we were in the car, and you said, "Look at all those white puffy clouds that God made!" This morning, Daddy asked you if a sore that you had on your arm was feeling better, and you said, "It is better. Praise the Lord!" It was so sweet! :) I pray that the Lord is working in your heart now and that He will soon call you to Himself. Watching you come to know the Lord as your Savior one day in the future, Lord willing, will be one of the most joyful days of my life. That is my greatest prayer for you. 

Aubrey, I'm not a perfect mother. You're not a perfect daughter. But I can honestly say that you (and Jude and Alaina) have fulfilled all of my dreams of Motherhood. As I said above, I've always loved babies and wanted to be a Mama. I didn't know it, but what I really wanted was to be your Mama. No one could ever love you more than me.

Happy Birthday, my four year old!
Mama